Cronyism in Venezuela and Costa Rica

…And in Really Bizarre News

By Jamie Douglas

Friends and fiends, some of the following may leave you wondering about reality, but I swear on the latest edition of Granma, that it is all true.

The Chávez Family in Caracas

According to the official news out of Venezuela, the Maximum Lider of that sad Bolivarian nation, Hugo Chávez died on March 3, 2013. But according to the people who were to embalm him for posterity, he had expired some time before that, as his organs had been rendered unsuitable for display-quality embalming due to decomposition.

Meanwhile, of course, the nation had to continue to be governed. Enter the infamous and (deliberately) incompetent bus driver Nicolas Maduro, who was handpicked by Chávez while he still had some marbles.

One would think that two of the Chávez family’s daughters would have vacated the premises in a dignified manner to relocate to one of the Chávez’s many country estates. After all, while the nation was suffering through one of its worst crises – shortages of food, inflation and the crumbling of its infrastructure – Hugo Chávez managed to steal at least a billion dollars, according to the Criminal Justice International Associates, while diverting another 100 billion dollars to cronies and criminal enterprises.

Perhaps the biggest blow to the Carcass in Caracas was that he was transported to his final resting place in an imperialist yanqui Cadillac. (A pretty old one I must say)

OK, so we know that Hugo has been dead for about a year. Now, we can report that two of his daughters have refused to surrender the presidential palace and are throwing wild and crazy parties there on a continuous basis, denying the new puppet president access to his (birth) right. Rosa Virginia and María Gabriela Chávez continue to occupy "La Casona" in Caracas, throwing big parties for their inner circle, costing tens of thousands of dollars, and continuing to live the corrupt lifestyle they were endowed with by their father.

Maybe it is time to remind them what happened to the Ceausescu family in Romania. Eventually, the people who have been screwed out of their heritage for so long will rise – and that could turn out very badly for Rosa and María.

The Chinchilla Family in Costa Rica

Meanwhile, Costa Rica’s lame duck president, Laura Chinchilla, must be getting ready to follow many of her predecessors into the corrupt nation’s penal system, probably along with a good number of her family members. This time, it involves the disastrous highway that was built along the Rio San Juan, along the border with Nicaragua. Not only was this highway built along the banks of the river, where the soft soil has already caused millions of dollars in erosion and cost overruns, but the whole project was built without any competitive bidding by a Chinchilla-family-owned outfit that had never before done anything of such magnitude.

It will eventually also be revealed what her secret trips to Colombia and Peru were about, when she just commandeered a corporate jet. (Cocaine maybe?)

But in Costa Rica, it is almost established custom for out-of-office politicians to meet in prison, where they have very comfortable accommodations. And when they are released, they still have all the loot, possibly moving to Panama where the administration of President Martinelli has held on to their ill-gotten gains for a small fee.

Jamie Douglas

At Large in South America

I encourage you to write me at cruzansailor [at] gmail [dot] com with any questions or suggestions you may have. Disclaimer: I am not in any travel-related business. My advice is based on my own experiences and is free of charge (Donations welcome). It is always my pleasure to act as a beneficial counselor to those who are seekers of the next adventure.